In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

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Farmfresh
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by Farmfresh » Thu Apr 26, 2018 3:38 pm

Once upon a time their was a man who was in the fertilized egg business. He had a hundred young laying hens, called pullets, and 8 to 10 roosters. It was of course the roosters job to keep all of those eggs fertilized. The man was very steadfast in his business practices and so kept very detailed records. Any rooster or hen that failed to perform up to his standards went immediately into the freezer and was replaced by a more productive bird.

Keeping records in this way was taking all day, so the man decided to streamline his business by attaching a small bell around the neck of each rooster. Each bell had a different tone, which allowed the man to simply listen to the action instead of having to keep a visual record. This made a things a lot better for the man. He just made a tally mark for each rooster as he bred the hen. Now he could record the progress and fill out his efficiency reports at the same time!

All went well for some time and then suddenly one day the man realized that he hadn't heard a bell from his favorite rooster all day. Concerned he went out to figure out what the problem was. When he got out to the chicken yards he noticed all of the roosters seemed to be healthy and strong and all were indeed regularly plying their trade. The he got a surprise. While most of the roosters ran after the hens - bells ringing - his favorite rooster would just slowly walk up and breed one willing hen after another. That smart bird was holding his bell in his beak, so it would make no noise and he could simply sneak up on each hen.

The man could not believe how intelligent that rooster was! He was so proud he decide to enter him in the big poultry show at the State Fair on the following week. The rooster was an overnight sensation! Not only did he win most of the rooster class prizes, he was actually awarded BOTH the No-Bell Prize as well as the Pullet Surprise.
Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."
"Stop Dreaming About the Good Life and Start Living IT !"
Every little bit ... is a little bit.

patriceinil
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by patriceinil » Thu Apr 26, 2018 4:45 pm

|em12|

dizzy
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by dizzy » Thu Apr 26, 2018 4:57 pm

Groan! |em12|

Not too long ago, I was asked if I had to keep my roosters away from the eggs. The person asking me thought roosters fertilized the eggs outside of the hen the way fish do!

patriceinil
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by patriceinil » Thu Apr 26, 2018 5:34 pm

|em26|

Rhodie Ranch
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by Rhodie Ranch » Fri Apr 27, 2018 9:09 am

CUTE!!!!!!!

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Old Fashioned
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by Old Fashioned » Mon Apr 30, 2018 10:54 pm

Another question from a new chicken owner.........

When does a cockerel begin to mate hens? Don't hens have to be in heat first? |em12|


(Sorry, I'm sure it's probably not all that funny.....but when I first seen that I almost peed. Sometimes I think chicken keeping isn't for everyone....but then we've all got to start somewhere)

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Farmfresh
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by Farmfresh » Tue May 01, 2018 1:55 am

|em12| Now that's a hoot!
Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."
"Stop Dreaming About the Good Life and Start Living IT !"
Every little bit ... is a little bit.

patriceinil
Posts: 9484
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2015 9:49 pm
Location: Illinois

Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by patriceinil » Tue May 01, 2018 10:03 pm

|em26|

Rhodie Ranch
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by Rhodie Ranch » Fri Jul 13, 2018 5:41 pm

Two guys grow up together but after college one moves to Michigan , the other to Florida . They agree to meet every ten years in Vero Beach to play golf
At age 30, they finish their round of golf and go to lunch.
"Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"Well, you know, they got the broads, with the big racks, and the tight shorts, and the legs ..."
"OK."
Ten years later at age 40 they meet and play again.
"Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters.
"Why?"
"Well, you know, they got cold beer and the big screen TVs and everybody has a little action on the games."
"OK."
Ten years later at age 50 they meet and play again."Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"The food is pretty good and there is plenty of parking."
"OK."
At age 60 they meet and play again.
"Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"Wings are half price”
"OK"
At age 70 they meet and play again.
"Where you wanna go?"
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"They have 6 handicapped spaces right by the door."
"OK."
At age 80 they meet and play again.
"Where you wanna go?
"Hooters."
"Why?"
"We've never been there before."

patriceinil
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Re: In Search Of A ... Good Hard Laugh!

Unread post by patriceinil » Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:14 pm

|em12|

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